Ask Sanyin: What Does Vulnerability Really Mean for Leaders?

At a time of increased uncertainty throughout our business, I feel that it’s important to be a rock, and to show positivity, for the people on my team. But I know it’s important to show more vulnerability at times like this. How can I do both?

It’s easy to equate vulnerability with sharing your own anxieties. But for leaders, the point of vulnerability is to meet your people where they are and let them see that you can relate to how they are feeling. They won’t trust you to lead them if they don’t think you understand them.

Vulnerability is powerful only if it fosters connection and shared learning. Some leaders are innately unflappable, and it’s a challenge for them to connect with their team’s anxieties. If you’re feeling some of that anxiety, celebrate your humanness — it’s what enables you to connect! The challenge for you is to be disciplined and intentional about what you do with that connection. How are you going to ferry them (and yourself) from that point across to hope and possibility?

Consider how you are trying to boost morale. If you are a relentlessly positive “rock” who hides your own worries, you may invalidate your team members’ feelings about difficult realities — and also lose credibility with overly optimistic reassurances. But being vulnerable enough to admit that you, too, are anxious, and acknowledging concerns, sets you up to rally others. The kind of optimism they need is your confidence that by coming together as a team, you can collectively solve problems. When you admit that you don’t have all the answers, you can frame that as an invitation for others to contribute their ideas.

Being honest about tough situations makes it easier for your team to be frank about what they observe. After all, it’s hard to speak up about problems if your boss minimizes negative news. But in difficult times, it’s critical to have a culture that surfaces problems quickly. Without honest feedback, you will have a harder time getting ahead of your challenges.

You can also be a steadying influence by remembering to call out the good things you see. No matter how strong the headwinds in your business, there will be small wins and moments to celebrate. These can be examples of how well your team members cohere, or of how they support and back one another up. Be on the lookout for those moments. You can also remind people about how the team succeeded at other difficult times, and how they were able to build resilience and use their creativity. Those memories are proof points that they can prevail in the face of challenges.

I’ll leave you with a perspective from my friend Jim Kim: “We don’t arrive at optimism through didactic analysis. Optimism is a moral choice.”

Jim understands what it’s like to face a bleak reality: He co-founded Partners in Health, which helped turn around the global AIDS crisis at a time when that seemed impossible.

Optimism is a choice you can make amid your vulnerability and honesty about challenges. You have to choose to believe that a positive outcome is possible, or you have already lost. You can’t develop a solution if you don’t believe one exists. Your job with your team is to connect with vulnerability and empower them with the energy, optimism, and analytical discipline needed to turn that potential for good into reality.